I had to do breathing exercises before I started this post. There are a lot of bands out there today that I don’t like (Dave Matthews, Fall Out Boy, etc) but none of them even come close to rivaling the pure auditory torture that graces my innocent eardrums when a certain band’s music (if one could even call them a band, more like a few homeless old cats meowing in tandem) flies through the air and manifests itself on my radio. All it takes is hearing the first chord of one of their horribly thrown-together songs (songs? more like an arrangement of discordance) for me to physically assault the vessel which emits it.
Yes, readers. I am describing Nickelback.
They need to bathe.
I am of the worthy opinion that they are part of a huge conspiracy to destroy the music industry from the inside out. Well it didn’t work for Erasmus so it better fucking not work for Nickelback! I don’t understand how people can actually … like them. All of their songs sound exactly the same, as can be witnessed by this charming website. REALLY? They are like a cult! They get ‘em young, they attract young Americans with their filth to ensure that these kids’ musical tastes never evolve past whiny 7th grader! IT’S HORRIFYING. Nickelback is like a virus infecting the minds of the weak! They’re like the crazy fundamentalists who don’t believe in evolution coming to your kindergarden class to BRAINWASH YOU. They’re like parents who won’t let their young daughters play with dolls so she doesn’t develop a poor body image!
NICKELBACK IS EVERYWHERE.
SAVE YOURSELVES.
-Meghan
PS: I just did a facebook search to see which of my friends listed Nickelback under their favorite music, and it is an EMBARASSING AMOUNT. I can’t believe this. I may have to defriend them, and we all know how low that hits below the proverbial belt.
mmmmeghan
thumbs up, bitches.
7 Comments
August 11, 2008 at 5:34 pm
I didn’t know Nickelback was still around. I believe I’ve heard them referred to as “redneck rock.” Pretty accurate.
August 15, 2008 at 10:30 pm
You sit there in your heartache
Waiting on some beautiful boy to
To save you from your old ways
You play forgiveness
Watch him now, here he comes
August 16, 2008 at 1:21 am
That’s the Killers. I don’t get it.
August 16, 2008 at 2:49 am
What’s the next line? What’s the title of this entry?
COME ON.
August 16, 2008 at 3:21 am
OH. Haha ok that’s a good one. Sorry I’m stupid
August 20, 2008 at 9:21 am
dude, i fucking hate nickelback. I’m allergic to Nickelback. I actually begin to itch when i hear the opening bars of Rockstar. so glad that there are others out there who agree with me.
August 26, 2008 at 9:50 am
i agree they suck and too many people think they play good “music”.